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I was a stay at home mom just a couple years ago. But not anymore and even though I want to stay home with my kids again, it will be as a work out of the home mom.

So why was I letting my husband control all of the money? Even to the point where I cannot access our joint bank account online.

I bring home just as much money as he. I ask for money. I ask to spend money before I do so. I’m not a kept woman. I work very hard for my money, but can’t get my money without him. He gets money out of the account all the time. He spends it without giving me a second thought.

Well, I got scared straight this week. One of my friends opened up to me. Her husband kicked her out of the house. Took her car because it was in his name, not hers. Changed the locks so that she couldn’t get her things. The house is in his name!! Took all of the money out of their shared bank account.

None of that is legal.

She is currently staying with a coworker and is trying to get her paycheck redirected to a different bank account. I gave her the contact info for a friend of mine that specializes in family law. But it scared me.

My car is in my hubby’s name.

I already can’t get into our shared bank account.

Now I don’t think my husband is going to kick me out, but my friend didn’t seem to think that either. Things are a little rough between us right now and I just want to be protected if things go sour.

So today I opened a checking account in just my name. I have a little out of each paycheck going straight into that bank account. I opened my own PayPal account so that I could link my Country Scents commissions straight to it, instead of using his. I even switched my Etsy commissions to my new bank account.

I. Feel. Free.

I was almost giddy and on the brink of tears as my phone started blowing up with confirmation texts. I will never again have to ask for money to buy something as essential as milk. Or ask if I can buy the kids clothes because they hit a growth spurt. I don’t have to justify my purchases anymore. And it will encourage me to work on this blog and my other endeavors as I only have a little amount of my check going into that account.

I haven’t told my husband and I don’t think I’m going to. If he finds out, I’ll just say that it’s for my business stuff.

It’s not the 1950’s anymore.

I’m not a stay at home mom anymore.

I’m going to be an independent wife and mother.

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